Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Waiting to land...in faith! (from Jen)

A friend of ours gave us a cd last week with the most beautiful song on it. She went through the loss of a child in her womb and found hope and comfort in this song...so she passed it along to us in this season of walking through impossible situations! Joseph and I have been listening to it daily, letting the faith within us grow. Allowing our hearts to remember daily that God is truly in control of this situation and that all we can do is posture our hearts in a place of faith and simply wait.



We're in a waiting period right now...a holding pattern over the runway below us...we're waiting on many things. We're believing that Sarah's life will truly be a sign and a wonder to this world of unbelief. March 7th marks exactly 2 months since we received the original news...it also marks the day that we go back to the man who gave us the news for a second ultra sound. He's the local expert and had advised us it was best to probably abort because there wasn't hope of her living much longer. It will be two months. She has grown, her heart is strong and her feet and arms are moving like crazy. We're praying for the next two weeks leading up to the appointment, that God would allow this doctor to see the improvements and healing taking place in Sarah's life and be drawn to the glory of God. Like Joseph has said over and over...this is bigger than us, its bigger than Sarah...it's about His glory being revealed. I wrote out the lyrics to the song below because I wanted to share with you the power of agreement...agreeing with us and agreeing with God that Sarah will be healed...that Sarah will truly be a sign and a wonder to this world of unbelief, to this world of hopelessness. It's a bit repetitive, but until I can figure out a way to put the song up on this page for you to listen to, this is the best I can do:


Faith, is the assurance of things hoped for,
the evidence of things unseen.
Faith, is the assurance of things hoped for,
the evidence of things unseen.

Little Faith, little baby come forth.
You will live and not die thus says the Lord.
Little Faith, little baby come forth.
You will live and not die thus says the Lord.

And even though the enemy tried to put you out.
And even though the enemy tried to snuff you out.
And even though the enemy tried to abort your destiny...
He will not succeed.

Faith, is the assurance of things hoped for,
the evidence of things unseen.
Faith, is the assurance of things hoped for,
the evidence of things unseen.

Little Faith, little baby come forth.
You will live and not die thus says the Lord.
Little Faith, little baby come forth.
You will live and not die thus says the Lord.

Your life will be a sign and a wonder.
A testimony of the faithfulness of God.
Your life will be a sign and a wonder.
A testimony of the faithfulness of God.

Let faith be born into a world of disbelief.
Let faith be born into a world,
Into a world of faithlessness
Into a world of hopelessness
Let faith be born

Little Faith, little baby come forth.
You will live and not die thus says the Lord.
Little Faith, little baby come forth.
You will live and not die thus says the Lord.

And even though the enemy tried to snuff you out.
And even thou the enemy tried to abort your destiny...
He will not succeed.

Your life will be a sign and a wonder.

Faith, is the assurance of things hoped for,
the evidence of things unseen.
Faith, is the assurance of things hoped for,
the evidence of things unseen.

The heart of the Father will be heard.
The heart of the Father will be heard.

Let the little children come to Me.
Even if nobody wants them, I do.
Let the little children come to Me.
Even if nobody wants them, I do.

If your father forsook you.
If your mother never comforted you.
I have the kingdom for you,
I've prepared a place for you.
And its deep within My heart.

So let the little children come to Me,
Even if nobody wants them, I do.
Let the little children come to Me,
Even if nobody wants them, I do.

If your father forsook you.
If your mother never comforted you.
I have the kingdom for you,
I've prepared a place for you,
And its deep within My heart.

I want you.
I want you.
I want you.

I want you.
I want you.
I want you.

You're accepted not rejected
You're loved and not despised.
You're accepted not rejected.
You're loved and not despised.

I'm calling you.
I'm calling you.

Little children....

You're accepted not rejected.
You're loved and not despised.

And mothers and fathers hear My heart.
And mothers and fathers hear My heart.

So let the little children come to Me,
Even if nobody wants them, I do.
Let the little children come to Me,
Even if nobody wants them, I do.

Let them come...

(Please continue to pray with us for the complete healing of little Sarah...she's fighting for her life and I want to continue to fight with her. Thank you!!)

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

About Sarah - New Update

Family and friends -

We had our first visit with our new doctor yesterday. It was mostly an informative meeting getting to know the doctor and allowing the doctor to get know us. But when all of that was over, we checked Sarah's heartbeat. Scott and Joan (jen's parents) are in town, so we invited them in to hear the heartbeat. While doing that, the doctor decided to suddenly to do a quick ultra sound scan of Sarah to see where her body position was. Suddenly without warning, we were looking at a screen of Sarah's body. This was the first time seeing her since our very first ultra sound. Here we are again, looking at Sarah on a black and white screen. It was a little unsettling at first. You're believing to see the promises of God, but it's still overwhelming to stand in that place and look into her little life. But this time something was different about her. She's wasn't looking like she did the first time. We all looked on in amazement at what appeared to be a healthy well formed child. We saw hands and fingers. We could see her body and spinal cord and legs. We saw her little face and eyes and it seemed like her head was not swollen with hydracephalus at all. She looked, in all respects, like what we've all been believing for and praying for - she looked healthy and whole.

Doctor Echt was not reading the ultra sound looking for problems, all she was doing was letting us see how she was positioned in Jen, pointing out different parts of her body like the heart, which was beating beautifully by the way. So there was no analysis happening, but we were looking. As she was moving the ultra sound wand around on Jen's stomach, little Sarah was kicking and moving all over the place. Sarah seems to be developing fine! The doctor wasn't saying that. She didn't have time to really take an in depth look at what the ultra sound was revealing. But to u,s we felt we were seeing a miracle. We have another ultra sound on the seventh of March with the doctor who gave us the results of the first ultra sound, so we'll have more analysis on another ultra sound then. But by our perspective, we are seeing the power of prayer, and the power of a miracle working God bringing about a supernatural healing of our little Sarah's life. We are excited! So we wanted to share that with everyone who is standing with us.

This journey with Sarah started with unfavorable news. Presently, we are no where near the other end of this journey with her. She only weighs a pound a half - so she's tiny and still being formed. We are moving toward the fulfillment of things we feel God has spoken to us but we're not there yet. We haven't left our knees concerning her, though we are encouraged by what we saw yesterday. We need and would love your continued support and prayers until the glory of God is fully revealed. Thanks again from Jen and I for praying. We so appreciate it. Praise God for His kindness to us...

- Joseph and Jen

Friday, February 15, 2008

Sarah Update from Jen...

Hello friends and family,

Just a quick update on Sarah Elizabeth. I had my 25 week checkup today and again, she's totally shocking the doctors with her strength. I've gained 5lbs (a total of 7 now!!) and my uterus is the exact size it should be at this point. Her heart rate was even stronger than last month's appointment (142bpm)...I literally had to remind the doctor of his diagnosis a few months ago (one because he's older and a bit out of it, but also because she's so healthy and growing so strong!). They literally look at me in shock every appointment, in disbelief that she's still alive. Sarah has also been kicking quite a bit the last few weeks, even waking me up in the middle of the night with the strength of her kicks. We have a little fighter :)

All of that to say....we wouldn't be where we are today without all the prayers and faith and hope that you have been sending our way! God has been so gracious and so kind through this journey. Thanks for the prayers....keep praying, we see a new doctor on Wednesday of this next week and are excited to have a doctor that will support us in our decision to move forward in the pregnancy.

Be blessed to know that your prayers are being answered....we will continue to fight for the healing of Sarah Elizabeth, knowing that God is ultimately in control :) (Isn't that a relief?)

Monday, February 11, 2008

Learning to live under waterfalls



"... they had no depth of soil."

Our depth of soil is important. God wants to take the power of His word, the power of His presence to depth in us. He wants His life in us to go deeper than the vaneers we might know Him in and keep Him in. He is not satisfied with small depth. He wants more relationship than that. He wants more closeness. He wants more connection. He wants nothing in the way. He wants everything. He wants full disclosure, full unveiling. He wants nothing short than complete oneness. He wants union realized, not just union positionally given. He wants to go to deep places in us.

"... Deep calls out to deep to the sound of your waterfalls..."

The deep places in God are calling out to the deep places in us. We are both the ones hearing the "calling out", and we are the ones "calling out." That "calling out" in the heart of God is to be heard in our hearts as they open to God and to others. God is speaking heart to heart... with us.

If you listen with the ears of your heart, you will hear a sound that's reaching to the deep places in you. When Jesus spoke there was a sound heard in the heavens speaking to the deep places in the hearts of men. And for those who had ears to hear, it was heard in their hearts as well. You could say what Jesus spoke was more beautiful than anything else that had ever been spoken. His voice released a sound to the listening ear. It was a sound that would set mens hearts free. At the entrance of His words there was light, and that light was the light of men. The movement of His heart under the anointing as He disclosed Himself to men, as He spoke to His beloved people, from prositutes to lawyers, from drunkards to business men, to tax collectors, was the most beautiful of songs that had ever been sung. It was pure music. And those who heard it fell to their knees and worshiped. It was the greatest of poetry that had ever been spoken. His life was poetry. It was the song of all songs in living color, in human flesh as He dwelt among us. He still dwells among us today and His heart is open to us as it was then.

What was on John the Baptist was great. His calling out was great. But what's in us is even greater than he. And our calling out is just as important or greater. That's what Jesus said. God is connecting us to the eternal sound of His words. He wants us to hear it.. for when we do, that hearing produces faith.

Jesus is still speaking today. With the same romance that was in his heart when He walked the earth is still in Him today as He walks the earth of mens hearts. There is a sound for this moment, for now. He is pulling from the eternal song a melody for us to sing today. That's what has been happening with Jen and I. Father is tuning us into what He's singing right now. We are hearing a sound in our hearts that is calling out to us. We can hear it... it's like the sound of water. It's beautiful. It says that His voice is like the sound of many waters. If you have ever sat next to a brook, and stopped to listen you know the sound.

There was a special place that I used to love to go to and listen to the sound of "many waters". In that place my eyes would close and listen. I would listen with the deepest parts of me. I wanted the sound to fill me. That place was my familys cabin.

When I was only a boy my Father bought a piece of property on the Trinity River. I remember the first day I saw it with my mother... it was a dream. All she could do when she saw it was cry. There was no place like it on this earth, at least to some of us. It was a place of utter beauty and wonder. I spent many, many days there exploring God, myself and the creation He had made. All of it came together where two streams met. My heart and God's heart were forever tied together in that place as my life flowed into His and His into mine. I would get lost there in all the colors, sounds, textures, smells, and thoughts that would collide with my heart. I was the floating leaf. I was the beetle rounding the stone. I was the hawk circling over head. I was the grey squirrel leaping to another tree. I was the only deer in the meadow. Everything was too wonderful to be true. And to each wonderful discovery there was the sound of water escorting my heart to understand the essence of things. It was a special place and is a special place to me still. I will never forget my life along the banks of the trinity.

I spent thirty years there, a good portion of my life, enjoying a most precious gift from God to our family. The property was situated among streams. There was the mighty crown jewel called the Trinity, and then there was the Hawkins Creek rolling down past the cabin by the deck into the river. There was a location on the deck between the creek and the river that afforded the attentive listener a multiplicity of water sounds. All you had to do was quiet yourself and listen. You would then hear a most beautiful sound. You would hear the trickling of the creek to your left, and it's soft pounding of waterfalls as it flowed to the base of the creek where it spilled into the river. There the river would sing as it received the offering the creek was giving. The river hummed quietly to you and strong. It was not prideful in its passing, but confindent in it's course. You could feel it's power in the main channel, though its shoulders were gentle along the banks. It moved swiftly and gracefully whispering to you escorting you down river to where you would hear the roar of its powerful set of rapids. It's authority was ever true and unyielding.

You could isolate each sound if you wanted to. Or you could stand perfectly still and let all the sounds come together as they flowed in from near and far. I always would think of Jesus there and consider that this sound was like His voice. When the psalmist would try to express the beauty of His voice, all he could say was that it was like the sound of many waters. Or they would say it's like thunder. But on those days sitting on the deck with the warmth of the sun, I was being romanced by the eternal song of God as He called out to me, from deep unto deep at the sound of His waterfalls, as all his waves and breakers washed over me. It was a chorus of sounds lifting me into something more. There wasn't just rocks and trees there. There wasn't just birds and animals. There was a voice speaking. I heard a sound there that I'm hearing today. It's the same sound that brought me home. I felt at home in that place like no other place on earth. Jesus gave that to me there. He's giving it to Jen and I here now. This sound is the stuff of faith. We are learning to hear it and let it fill us. The eternal song of the eternal lover. He is love. Our lives are about love. That's why we are smiling. That's why we can laugh. We are hearing the song that God is singing over us. We are learning to live under waterfalls.

Faith to me is not like a cold stone or a hard rough object. It's not like cement or poured concrete. It's not hard really at all. But then faith can be hard and cold it seems... I don't know maybe we make it that way more than it's supposed to be. But one things for sure, I want to find the faith that is like a flowing stream, or a bubbling brook, that isn't made of cement. Can faith be gentle, full of hope, full of grace, full of love and full of delight, even full of laughter? I'm hoping so. We are venturing to believe so.

And those sounds we are wanting to hear for our lives are not just far off. They are close by too, just off the deck of our lives. They are in us even, coming forth from our own hearts. Our hearts are to be filled with music, with love, with the sounds of heaven. Our hearts are to overflow with this music, with worship. We are to release this sound to others. We do that by opening our hearts.

An open hearted person comes to depth and comes to healing. As a heart opens to people again, it opens to the Presence in a special way. Through God's people there is a voice crying out, like one crying out in the wilderness. It is crying out to the wilderness of soul so many people are living in. That cry in the heart of God to the cry of the broken hearted, to ones who have not been comforted by the words of Jesus, by the love of Father, is to be heard through us. You can say we become the sound of Heaven's Cry in the earth. We release the sound by our hearts opening to care for them. We allow the depth of us that's been touched by the sound of heaven to be opened to them. Our hearts open with the words of God to love as we ourselves have been loved. That's why it is so important to be loved and to be healed. Our hearts become beacons of a homecoming. Healing is a sound. It is a word. It's like a waterfall. Jesus said of Himself:

"I have come to bring good news to the afflicted;
I have come to bind up the borkenhearted,
to proclaim liberty to the captives..." (among many things)

Jesus spoke this... He was calling out. Deep unto deep at the sound of His waterfalls. What does the waterfall from heaven sound like? Read the verse again and you will hear it. The brokenhearted healed. That's what's in the waterfall. That's what the rocks under the water are revealing. They would cry out if we don't. They know, creation knows, that there is healing for itself in us. Creation groans for the sons of God to be revealed. Creation as well as the peoples of the earth are waiting to hear from us. We will sing, we will rejoice and worship when we ourselves learn to hear the sound and the words Jesus is singing. We simply need to return to the decks of hearts where two streams meet. We need to return to the healing sound, to the poetry in the heart of God as He sings over us His song of love. Let us hear again Him "calling out". Let us return to all that's pure and good. We will once again be like children at play in His fields. We will be the beetle finding it's way. We will be the deer filling up on blackberrys. We will be tree planted by the living water. We will be the trout meadering in the shade of the deep pool. We will come home. We will be living in "our cabins", in our dreams forever.

This is what we learning to do with Sarah in our lives. We are learning to be in our dreams. She is apart of that. She is our little dream in a bundle under a veil of flesh. Without hearing the sound of heaven, without understanding the melody and the words to the song, we would not be in a dream. We would be in a tradegy. Thank you God that we don't live where streams don't flow. We live in a place where rivers flow. Jen and I are staying in the song Jesus is singing over Sarah. It's a word. It's a sound. And everyday we are moving ourselves under the waterfall, moving to a place of faith, to hear God speak to us.. deep unto deep.

Friday, February 1, 2008

All We Need is Love... (short entry from Jen)

Joseph has been doing all of the writing for the Sarah Pages...I've been so blessed and so encouraged to get on here and chew on the words he's been writing. His heart has been incredibly "God inspired" and its a joy to get to tap into that place through this blog...

I read a quote today by Dietrich Bonhoeffer and simply wanted to share it...it seems to go with the flow of where Joseph's heart has been leading this blog:

"The person who loves their dream of community, will destroy community, even if their intentions are ever so ernest. But the person who loves those around them will create community."

All we need is love :)